Sorry friends, if you were looking for a fast and easy list of what to “gift” that special mom in your life, this article isn’t it. Celebrating moms isn’t just a one-day event. Moms need more than recognition; they need real change to improve their lives.
In my experience, being a mom in real estate can present massive challenges, with the greatest rewards. But I’m not going to lie and say that it has been all rainbows and sunshine. In fact, trying to balance a household, a budget, homework, a career, child care and after-school activities together as a single mom isn’t for the faint of heart.
You have to work harder than you ever thought possible, and there is not a single self-help book or parenting book that truly prepares you for parenting a kid in today’s hectic world.
Navigating elaborate and never-ending tasks, to-dos, and routines are what most moms specialize in. Still, you throw in the challenges of societal social constructs and a struggling economy that complicates, confuses, and delays success for most working moms, and you get a very specific set of wants for Mother’s Day, and it’s probably not what’s on your shopping list.
Here are five things busy real estate moms want more than flowers, cards, brunch, perfume, and candy.
@marisaramireztherealtor A day in the life of a real estate mom 🏡🗝#realestateagent #realestate #momlife #fyp #funny ♬ original sound – Marisa Salena
A real break
Going to the grocery store alone isn’t a real break. Many tasks need to be completed in any real estate transaction, and mastering your time is the key to knocking out all the tasks. They want a solid lunch break without interruptions and to not feel guilty about it.
They need you to convert your own PDF, and don’t waste their time when they are in the office. Change the toner in the copier. Please don’t leave a mess in the conference room they have to clean up before they bring clients in to meet. They need you not to ask why the floor is sticky; if the floor is sticky, grab a mop and clean it up.
@mary.fisher.x I’m just tired. Being a mum is so hard, I love it but it’s so hard too. #foryoupage #DidYouYawn #fyp #trending #StopScammerTime #boymom #firsttimemom #postpartumdepresssion #momlife #pregnancy #baby #cutebaby #mentalhealth #mentalhealthmatters #anxiety #depressed ♬ Lights Are On – Tom Rosenthal
Participation
They don’t want help. They want more equitable participation in household chores, decision-making, and bills. One person shouldn’t be in charge of everything; all the invisible things like teacher gifts, birthdays, planning dinner, sports, dr.s appointments and more take time, energy and patience to plan. Jump in and take over some of the load.
I can’t tell you how many times I just wished I didn’t have to make one more decision. Decision fatigue is the worst feeling because you know you have to figure out how to get everything done, and that if you do not, your routine will be a trainwreck. Most individuals have to make more than 35,000 decisions a day. Participate, help and get in the game to make some decisions and take some of the mental load off.
@kaylareporting CONFIRMED: Mama needs a nap! #Fyp #NewsVoice #funny #ParentingHumor #Humor #ParentsOfTikTok #MomReport #MomLife #Toddler #Vacation #Family #FamilyVacation ♬ original sound – Kayla Marie Sullivan
Effort
Participation requires thought and planning. It’s not just remembering to bring the diaper bag; it’s also checking to ensure it’s full. Bonus if it is not, go to the store and restock. Stop showing up empty-handed.
Don’t ask for a list; go to the pantry and see what’s missing. Or better yet take over meal planning. Did you know that the average American household spends 400 hours a year in the kitchen? Let’s not forget an additional 100 hours needed for laundry ( Is it just me or is this conservative?)
I used to have a nasty energy drink addiction. Why? Because I needed to hack a way to get everything done with very little sleep. When I didn’t have my kid I was showing homes or working my second job.
There were some weekends where I stayed up 48 hours straight just to make ends meet, and wash laundry, and there was never enough time and never enough energy.
@clarabellecwbI gave him a break!♬ Jazz Bossa Nova – TOKYO Lonesome Blue
Equal pay
In 2023 women are still not getting paid the same as men, and based on the unpaid workload at home, the gap gets even larger. That’s $287 out of a weekly paycheck, which means she got paid $14,924 less doing the same job in 2021. This wage gap has narrowed by 10 cents from 2011.
If you are a mom working in commercial real estate, the wage gap is even larger. A study that quietly went under the radar in 2020 showed that women in this sector of real estate earned on average Women continue to earn less than men. The fixed salary gap between genders is 10.2 percent and the commission and bonus gap is a staggering 55.9 percent.
Women real estate brokers and sales agents made 78 cents to the dollar men earned in 2021. – Narrowthegap.co
I cannot stress this enough if you are a busy working mom. Research what you are supposed to be earning, and make sure that you are getting it. The only person who will be worried that you are earning fair market wages is you. Not management.
@stefanieorodriguez The stereotype that mothers are less committed and competent at work is often used to justify the motherhood penalty – the fact that mothers are offered fewer opportunities, promotions and raises at work. But when mothers push back against that stereotype by providing indisputable evidence of their competence and commitment, they’re still more likely to be discriminated against, just for a different reason – for being perceived as less warm and less likable. #motherhoodpenalty #ambitiouswomen ♬ original sound – Stefanie OConnell Rodriguez
Paid maternity leave and affordable childcare
Real estate has been touted as a great job for busy moms who need a flexible career, but as an independent contractor, you have to do a ton of planning and saving to take off work to have a baby and recover from childbirth. Depending on your household expenses, that may mean that you need a second income to make this work. The shocking truth is that you will need to plan for a significant portion of your income to pay for child care to go to work.
Child care is ridiculously expensive; I had to take out installment loans to cover summer camps and child care on more than one occasion. Yes, I had to borrow and pay interest on it to pay for childcare so I could go to work. Think about that. Think about the harsh reality of the pressure that puts on women and families.
The national average annual cost of child care in 2020, the latest data available, was $10,174. That figure represents more than 10% of the median income for a married couple and more than 35 percent of the median income for a single parent.- Demanding Change Report
@femalequotient The cost of #childcare in the U.S. keeps many women out of work. The average national price for one child? $10,600 each year. 🤯 “For families that are headed by a divorced parent, or in households of color, that price of child care is more than a quarter of the family’s income, up to as much as 60% of total household income. That’s just not sustainable for families,” said Anne Hedgepeth, chief of policy and advocacy at ChildCare Aware of America. But it doesn’t need to be this way. In many countries around the world childcare is affordable, if not free, and parents are supported. In fact, New Mexico is the first state to address the childcare crisis with a new law that will make childcare free for nearly all residents. We want to hear from you – where do you live and how much do you pay for childcare monthly? Weigh in below! 👉 @usa.mom.in.germany #parent #parents #germany #germany🇩🇪 #fyp #foryoupage ♬ original sound – Female Quotient
Final thoughts
When I was selling homes in my mid 20’s as a newly single mom after a nasty divorce, most days felt impossible. I had my son with me a great deal for showings and office appointments when I couldn’t get child care(Evenings and weekends mostly) but work needed to be done.
If you are a broker and have the room and space to create a child-friendly entertainment area in your office, it would probably be greatly appreciated by agents juggling more than their fair share.
My one former client still tells the story of how my then 4-year-old son went back into the office kitchen and fixed a huge thing of peanut butter sandwiches while we signed a contract one evening.
If you have a busy working real estate mom, take a look at her schedule and see where you can jump in and make an impact. Don’t brush the social issues to the side and say the problem is too big and too hard to solve. Even if you can impact and help a mom close to you, that change can ripple far beyond what you think.
The characterization of our culture that makes the overstressed, overworked mom a punchline is not only not funny to women trying to dig their way out of “having it all,” but it also continues to teach that it’s just how moms are. That’s just what being a mom is like. Nope. If moms had half of the support mentioned on this short list, I think moms would be much happier.
@stephigreen I believe we all get this point 😂#kittyforeman #that70sshow #edit #edits #overstimulatedmom #overstimulation #tired #mom #momsoftiktok #explore #explorepage #alittleirrational #today ♬ original sound – Steph
It’s the moms holding so much of this journey together for all of us. It’s never going to fit exactly in the box, but we can do so much better than what we are doing for moms out there.
That’s what motherhood and real estate is. It’s peanut butter everywhere, but the service and dedication is unmatched.
Rachael Hite is a former agent, a business development specialist, fair housing advocate, copy editor, and is currently perfecting her long game selling homes in a retirement community in Northern Virginia. You can connect with her about life, marketing, and business on Instagram
